Finding Acceptance in a Social Media Post
Written by: Kimberly Harkey, MEd, LPC-S
If you’ve often felt misunderstood, unable to fit in, outcast, or not accepted by others, five minutes of scrolling in social media will help you find at least 5 labels and maybe even a diagnosis to describe yourself. Introverted? Ambivert? Highly Sensitive Person? Neurodivergent?
You might see a post about the 5 hidden traits of someone with ADHD, the 6 ways you know you’re autistic, 7 behaviors of someone with anxiety, or the 3 things Enneagram 7s do for work. And so many of us feel drawn to finding a label they identify with.
I’m not here to argue about self diagnosing or even critique the influencers. I’m not going to bash social media. What I really want to talk about is why these posts are so appealing. Why are we drawn to these quick posts? What is so appealing about finding ways to describe ourselves?
How these posts are helpful:
It’s validating. Having a term to describe what you’re experiencing can be validating. It might give you an answer to the ‘what is happening to me?’ question. This can be especially true for communities that have traditionally been marginalized and overlooked in mental health: BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, and females to name a few. Social media has increased awareness of how your experience might be different if you are not in the majority. Whether it leads you to a diagnosis or not, it’s nice to find acceptance and know you aren’t alone.
It can give you a quick answer. Now you have a way to reply to anyone that says something (if you even want to respond), but more importantly you have an objective way to identify yourself, for your brain. It gives you a word to use to validate your identity other than weird, awkward, abnormal. It is new lingo for you to use that isn’t demeaning and may help you find self-acceptance. Where you may have described yourself as misunderstood before, you can now feel understood by the poster and likely many others in the comments.
It’s nice to feel special while also leading you to feel less alone. Having a term to describe what you’re going through can help you own being an outsider rather than feeling like a fish out of water. Our modern society has so many of us feeling marginalized, misunderstood or alone. You can find others like you with similar traits. You can build a sense of camaraderie, community, and belonging.
It gives you permission to be you. You can stop masking, stop pretending. You can let down your walls. You can seek out humans who accept you for who you are. You can feel clear on setting boundaries when others don’t understand. You can use the energy you used for masking to pour into something that brings you joy.
I’m working toward acceptance. Now what?
There are certainly downsides to taking any of these labels to heart: limiting yourself, misunderstanding a diagnosis due to reading a short post with little context, and many others. However, these posts can also empower you to seek support and encouragement from a professional to live your life to the beat of your drum and feel confident in your identity. You can identify what you love about yourself and want to keep, set goals around things that you want to be better at, and learn to live life in a way that matches your values and strengths.
